Funny Turandot Parking Story

[lennygoran]

I found this funny-afterall we've dealt with parking situations before operas for years now! Len still in st petersburg checking out wildlife refuges and gardens.

https://www.nytimes.com/2018/02/06/nyre ... collection

[Belle]

Loved that humorous anecdote, Len. I'd be afraid to leave my car parked in NYC, to be honest.

Talking about parking; my car has an automatic parking function where you take your hands off the wheel and it parks the car beautifully. OK so far, except that whenever you slow down along the road to about 20kmp a sign lights on the dashboard with an arrow which indicates "P" - meaning that you've just arrived at a place where you could park!! So, all the time "P", "P", "P".... on and on it goes. And if you stray next to the line on the freeway the car sends a signal "time for a coffee break" and that sign won't go away (over-riding all other electronic messages) until the engine is turned off. It does your head in!!!!!

[lennygoran]

Belle your car sounds to complicated for me-I'd be more afraid of getting into it then parking my car in nyc! We're renting a car down here and I begged and got a car that uses a key to start it-they still have some of them left. I dread the day we have to buy a new car that won't use a key. Len [dinosaur]

[Belle]

Meet a fellow dinosaur, if you please!! I've only driven our car twice before and I had to go and collect my husband at the railway station today. He said 'just follow steps 1, 2, 3 and 4; easy". I pressed the ignition; nothing. Again. Nothing. Grrr. Oh, OK, foot on the brake first is it? Bingo. Press that green thing that stops the car shutting down anytime the car has to stop.....Oh, I forgot and now the engine has stopped and there are cars everywhere; (traffic light turns green) the car started again without me putting my foot on the accelerator. How did it do that?!! Does it have a connection sensor to the green traffic light? No, stupid, you took your foot off the brake and that was enough to initiate engine start-up!! Sigh.

[barney]

Love the story.
What sort of car is it, Belle? I presume it's a hybrid/electric model? I've only driven one once, and it would take a little getting used to.

[Belle]

Love the story.
What sort of car is it, Belle? I presume it's a hybrid/electric model? I've only driven one once, and it would take a little getting used to.

No, it's not a hybrid vehicle but a German diesel SUV with all the very latest sophisticated bells and whistles. Too complicated for its rapidly aging owners!! The next door neighbours bought exactly the same car, even the same colour, a few weeks after we bought ours (!!) and we both laugh about how we can't program anything. (First world problem!)

[lennygoran]

Meet a fellow dinosaur, if you please!! I've only driven our car twice before and I had to go and collect my husband at the railway station today. He said 'just follow steps 1, 2, 3 and 4; easy". I pressed the ignition; nothing. Again. Nothing. Grrr. Oh, OK, foot on the brake first is it? Bingo. Press that green thing that stops the car shutting down anytime the car has to stop.....Oh, I forgot and now the engine has stopped and there are cars everywhere; (traffic light turns green) the car started again without me putting my foot on the accelerator. How did it do that?!! Does it have a connection sensor to the green traffic light? No, stupid, you took your foot off the brake and that was enough to initiate engine start-up!! Sigh.

I'm in complete dread! Len

[maestrob]

I haven't driven since the 1980's, so I too would be flummoxed by all the new technology in cars. AND they say self-driving cars are just over the horizon......<shudder>

[Belle]

I think the younger generations think we oldies are neanderthals and luddites. They have the technological 'smarts' and seem to be running things; we have the cash and the experience and they're below us with their hands open waiting for us to fall off the perch - and take our bloody boring music with us!!

[barney]

I think the younger generations think we oldies are neanderthals and luddites. They have the technological 'smarts' and seem to be running things; we have the cash and the experience and they're below us with their hands open waiting for us to fall off the perch - and take our bloody boring music with us!!

Yes. Increasingly we are resented - there were articles in Melbourne last year about selfish boomers hanging on to large properties with just a couple of people on them. That's my wife and myself, but already this year my daughter and youngest son have separately spent time staying here, and all our children plus some of their cousins have stored things in bedrooms and under the house. (Large, of course, is relative. We have half an acre, which is tiny by country standards. But developers could get 8 units on it.)
Do you remember Old Dan Milligan (In Spike Milligan's Puckoon) who died and left all his money to himself?

[Belle]

I read that book in 1971 when a much-beloved boyfriend/adonis lent it to me. Last week I was at a funeral in Woy Woy on the NSW Central Coast (erstwhile abode of Spike Milligan) and I kept thinking of the comedian; he called it 'an above-ground cemetery'. The day the deceased was interred last week it was definitely below ground!!! And to the strains of "Did You Ever Know You Were my Hero?".

I kept wondering about music for funerals and whether I'd send the 'mourners' (cough) at mine out the door (or, worse, leave them flummoxed) if I played what's on my list!! Sadly, I won't really be there to gauge the, er, effects.

Our Treasurer has offered an incentive to extricate 'boomers' from their large homes. $300,000 from the proceeds of the sale per person can go into the superannuation fund without any conditions. Not much of a saving when you have costs and stamp duty on the new property. My husband won't budge anyway. He has chosen to remain a "selfish boomer/old fart"!! The younger generation can't be too critical, however, since they and their increasingly large boodle tend to 'home' like pigeons anyway.

[barney]

I read that book in 1971 when a much-beloved boyfriend/adonis lent it to me. Last week I was at a funeral in Woy Woy on the NSW Central Coast (erstwhile abode of Spike Milligan) and I kept thinking of the comedian; he called it 'an above-ground cemetery'. The day the deceased was interred last week it was definitely below ground!!! And to the strains of "Did You Ever Know You Were my Hero?".

I kept wondering about music for funerals and whether I'd send the 'mourners' (cough) at mine out the door (or, worse, leave them flummoxed) if I played what's on my list!! Sadly, I won't really be there to gauge the, er, effects.

Our Treasurer has offered an incentive to extricate 'boomers' from their large homes. $300,000 from the proceeds of the sale per person can go into the superannuation fund without any conditions. Not much of a saving when you have costs and stamp duty on the new property. My husband won't budge anyway. He has chosen to remain a "selfish boomer/old fart"!! The younger generation can't be too critical, however, since they and their increasingly large boodle tend to 'home' like pigeons anyway.

I'd forgotten that great line, "above-ground cemetery". Re younger generation: exactly. And it's nice for them to feel they can always come home, that there's a secure base.
My funeral music list, in a file on my computer that no one will ever read, is about 15 hours long. I want them to bring in portable toilets and lock the doors - but obviously without warning anyone first. I'd certainly be remembered, though possibly with even less affection than in life!

[Belle]

What a classic!! Another Aussie with a great sense of humour. Only one of my four children has taken to serious music and I bought him the book 'Music in the Castle of Heaven" for Christmas.

The other day I was talking to my healer and friend (GP). I said it worried me that I had trouble recalling information these days, hoping it wasn't a sign of incipient Dementia. He replied, "Nonsense; your head is so full of very interesting things, more and more, that it's natural that it would take longer to 'locate' certain information". God bless this diplomat and friend: I didn't believe a word of it!!!

(I hope I haven't told this story before!)

[barney]

What a classic!! Another Aussie with a great sense of humour. Only one of my four children has taken to serious music and I bought him the book 'Music in the Castle of Heaven" for Christmas.

The other day I was talking to my healer and friend (GP). I said it worried me that I had trouble recalling information these days, hoping it wasn't a sign of incipient Dementia. He replied, "Nonsense; your head is so full of very interesting things, more and more, that it's natural that it would take longer to 'locate' certain information". God bless this diplomat and friend: I didn't believe a word of it!!!

(I hope I haven't told this story before!)

Diplomatic, certainly, but I give it some credence. I reckon we do sort of get full brains, like that marvellous Far Side cartoon, that has a really thick-looking kid saying to the teacher, "Please sir, may I be excused? My brain is full!" The problem is not the concept but the youth of the subject, I submit. And we, while only on the cusp of early middle age (cough!), are possibly not in the first flush of youth...

[Belle]

"The first flush of youth" went the way of most flushes - except the hot ones!! It's the only time I might have ever been considered vaguely "hot", by the way!!