I Am Very Sad

[Ralph]

Just feel like sharing this.

I always get a phone call between 6 and 7AM from my oldest friend (since 7th grade). The phone rang as usual this morning but it was his wife to tell me he had suddenly died of an apparent coronary a few hours earlier. David was, to be sure, quite overweight, but otherwise healthy at 63. He was truly brilliant and shared with me many interests. His love of fine dining and outstanding homemade meals gave him much pleasure. It seemed just part of my day to always touch bases with him often. While he visited New York which he loved and missed several times a year, I couldn't bring myself to go to Cincinnati.

Loss of friends of my generation seems to be an inevitable part of growing older (if not necessarily old). In March my other longest time friend, Bob, died of colon cancer in California. I guess I find it ironic that I, who certainly have caused my health insurers the big bills, seem to be in great shape (or so my doctors tell me).

Well, it comes down to how important health is and how secondary everything else happens to be. I haven't learned anything new but the reinforcement has become too frequent.

[Donald Isler]

Very sorry to hear this, Ralph.

[josé echenique]

So sad to hear about your friend. I also love good food, especially pasta and wickedly sugary desserts, but I have a large Newfoundland dog and walk him evert day one and a half hours. Hope that helps.

[Teresa B]

I'm terribly sorry, Ralph. Five years ago I lost my best gal pal (since 9th grade) to a heart attack brought on by a diabetic crisis. She was 50. It was a total shock when her sister called with the news.

Ditto on your comment on health...(and glad you're in good shape),
Teresa

[jbuck919]

That was a terrible way to start your day, to say the least. You are blessed to have had friendships of such intensity and long standing. Give yourself credit also for your own remarkable talent for friendship.

[Barry]

That must have been a terrible shock. Sorry about your loss.

[John F]

Very to sorry to hear about your loss. And naturally it was shocking, coming without warning. I knew a college teacher in Phoenix, marvelous fellow and at 30-something in great physical shape, who suffered an embolism in his brain while out jogging and died alone at the side of the road - so much for the benefits of fitness and exercise. Meanwhile, we may not be perfect specimens but we're still here, somehow or other. All the best to you, then.

[IcedNote]

Sorry, Ralph. I can only hope that I have friendships that will last that long.

-G

[Dennis Spath]

Thank you for sharing Ralph....we all owe it to ourselves and our friends of long standing to keep in touch, and to keep them close when we can. I take pride in staying in touch with several friends going back to the late 1950's, at least a few phone calls every year and email. One, my roomate for a few years in the early 1960's, apparently passed away in late 2008. Another close friend from the 1970's...in his 80's...has dropped out of sight since sending an email about his wife's death last March.

A close friend of 55 years lives in Milwaukee. We were roommates in the Air Force (1955), and shares lots of adventures enforcing security regs for the Commanding General at Lages Field in the Azore Islands....where we hosted a 160 man Navy Intelligence contingent. I was his best man when he married in Milwaukee in 1958. Later our families exchanged weekend visits, we hosting them on their visits to Chicago while they hosted us when the Packers and Bears played their pre-season game in Milwaukee on the Labor Day weekend. His wife died two years ago after a long illness. When I was working in Chicago (1988-98) I visited them quite often, and now we talk on the phone every week or two....he has 28 grandchildren and five great-grandchildren, while my two grandchildren are only six and 8 months.

[Agnes Selby]

So sorry to hear the sad news, Ralph.

Regards,
Agnes.

[lennygoran]

>Loss of friends of my generation seems to be an inevitable part of growing older<

Yes, it's been a bad year for us too--hard to believe how many losses we had this year. My deepest sympathies to you. Regards, Len

[Chalkperson]

I'm so sorry, Ralph, loosing a good friend is very sad, please accept my condolences...

[NancyElla]

I am very sorry for the loss of your friend. You are fortunate to have had him as a friend for such a long time, but that only makes the loss greater and the pain deeper at his sudden death. May he live on in fond memories and in a special place in your heart.

[Seán]

Dear Ralph, we haven't exchanged messages in a very long time. I am sad that it is on a difficult occasion such as this that I do so. I hope that you are well and are able to come to terms with you deep loss at this time.
All the best.
Seán

[SaulChanukah]

That's very sad Ralph, I'm sorry for your loss.

Regards,

Saul

[Wallingford]

My sincerest condolences, Ralph.

[Werner]

Ralph, it was sad to read and, in a sense, share your shock at the sudden sad news.

As you say, growing older brings this experience with it, sadly, making it so much more important to cherish and celebrate our friends while we can.

Regards and best wishes,

[HoustonDavid]

I am so sorry for your loss, Ralph. Nothing like death of close friends and family to
remind us of mortality as we grow older. I am glad you are faring well after your own
close call not so long ago. I'm sure you didn't need a reminder of how preciouse life
really is.

David Sherman

[Ralph]

Thanks much for the kind comments. After I spoke with my friend's wife the first thing I did was post here. I think that says a lot about what this board and its members mean to me.

When I spoke to her again after midnight today she asked me "What are we going to do without him?" That simple question said it all about how much he was a part of our lives. We get older and suffer losses. David's death was the third of a close friend since March and there aren't many left. But I'm thankful for my good health and hopeful that those I care about, and that includes all here, enjoy good health for themselves and their families and loved ones.

[Ricordanza]

I am sorry for your loss, Ralph. Like others, I note with admiration your ability to maintain long-time friendships. It is not all that common (at least among men).
H

[Corlyss_D]

I add my condolences to the others. The deaths of two such close friends so suddenly and within a matter of months is a harsh blow.

[Evelyn Laden]

Ralph,

Sincere condolences on your recent losses. I can empathize. My two closest childhood friends died, although at different times, of ALS (amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, also known as Lou Gerhig's disease). We grew up in the same town, and spent most of our time together. People who know (knew) us wonder whether I will be the third to have this disease. I don't intend to become part of a cluster of such cases, but this coincidence nevertheless adds a serious question as to why two close friends died of the same, relatively rare disease.
Best wishes to you and your friend's wife.

Evelyn

[Cyril Ignatius]

My condolences on the death of your friend, Ralph. Friendship is actually somewhat rare in the real world, something that C.S. Lewis wrote about many years ago. All the more important to appreciate and mark those which we do have.

[Chanan]

I'm truly sorry for your loss, Ralph.

[Jean]

My heart is sad for your loss. My condolences to you and your friend's wife.
This reminds me to make sure all those I love know it not just in their hearts, but hear the words.

[Daisy]

I'm so sorry, Ralph, I know how it is to lose loved ones. My own husband had a mild stroke last week, and it was a traumatic experience, though he has been recovering nicely. I'll keep you in my prayers.

[Ralph]

I'm so sorry, Ralph, I know how it is to lose loved ones. My own husband had a mild stroke last week, and it was a traumatic experience, though he has been recovering nicely. I'll keep you in my prayers.

*****

All best wishes for his quick and full recovery.

[Cosima__J]

Such a simple and heartfelt thread title: "I Am Very Sad". Well nothing can take away the years of pleasure your friendship has given you. My condolences.

[Agnes Selby]

So sorry to hear about your loss, Ralph.